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Friday August 31st 2012, 7:57 pmIllusions, or better yet, delusions. Thats what I experience when thinking about my own appearance. And I suspect many of us do, there was a good brief example of this in a recent episode of Louie, very enlightening. I’ve been having to mull over publicity photos, having to make a choice. And I’m not happy with any of the choices in front of me, its not that they are bad photos, quite the opposite really. I just don’t feel like any of them represent me visually, but in reality it has more to do with I just don’t fully comprehend what I look like. And like I was saying, more than likely many of us experience this effect, even though we all look in the mirror daily. Somehow even that visage is colored by the perceptions that we have of ourselves, impacting our own sense of identity. I always have this experience when seeing photos of myself, feeling like its not really me I’m seeing, or tend to internally ask myself is that what I really look like. And in most instances I’m disappointed.
Vanity Pushing On Identity
August 31st 2012
2 Comments so far
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Hey there Ash
Yeah, its fascinating just how much our visual self perception is taken in by how we think we are, not the reality, and confronted by reality it can be a surprise. Your experience seemed rather a very profound one.
My own appearance in photographs always throws me off, because I’m a slightly stocky build but when I think about how I look I see the mental picture of myself as being much more narrow and angular.
Comment by jhw3 09.02.12 @ 9:32 pmLeave a Comment
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I’ve got a similar problem. As a kid, I couldn’t find myself in group photos. I remember looking at class photos and having to read the caption to know which one was me. After many years of self-reference for drawings and posing for other artists, recognition has followed. It still shocks me sometimes though.
The worst is our group dojo photos. For 8 years, I’ve been the only woman in a combat-centered martial art with men that outweigh me by 100lbs sometimes… everytime we take a group photo, I have to remind myself that yes, the chinadoll in the front row is me. It’s strange to be so small.
What is it about your appearance you find hard to identify with? Only if you wanna answer this, obviously…
Comment by Ash 09.02.12 @ 11:13 am